Summer is usually our down time. Much of my support system is built on teachers, and they have summers off. So, my support system is stronger, or at least more flexible. Sarah breathes better in the summer. She is not sick as often.
This summer, we spent time at my Godmother's house on Cape Cod. It is such a beautiful place. While we were there, Sarah breathed better than she ever has. It was a magical vacation. Since she breathed so well, and since ICU stays are expensive, we have decided to submit to insurance a claim for a house of our own up there. (We didn't. This is a joke.)
After I got through my fight with anxiety, we had a few peaceful weeks.
Then, Autumn. It used to be my favorite season.
Sarah started school, which is both the best and the worst news! (Yay class interaction and therapy! Boo germs!) I decided to homeschool Lily this year. (I promise to write about that soon.) Sarah had a surgery. (That too.) We are facing cold and flu season.
But really, things seemed to be going well.
We joined a CSA over the summer. We had decided to make general health a priority. Every week we collected a beautiful box of fresh produce from a local farm. Josh decided he wanted to run a marathon. I am so proud of him for setting such an ambitious goal!
He had been diagnosed with asthma about a decade ago. He has not had trouble recently, but I really thought that if he was going to run a marathon, he should get it checked out and get cleared. He went in for a full physical.
Good news! No asthma! He is clear to run!
Bad new: Diabetes.
The old truism, "Its not fair," comes to mind.
New specialists. New appointments. New doctors. You don't get to talk back when life hands you a rotten diagnosis, but you don't have to lose control either. We have been learning a whole lot of stuff we never wanted to know. Again.
We chose right away to spin it. This diagnosis hurts. It is scary. It is going to mean good things. Not just for Josh, but for the whole family.
The day after the diagnosis, I cleaned out the fridge, throwing away anything Josh couldn't eat. If he couldn't eat it, it didn't need to be in the house. We're doing this as a family. (Well. Except the Halloween candy. I am not that cruel. I won't eat it now, but the kids still can. Is that a reward? We won't be doing mac and cheese anymore, at least not a main course. Not even for lunch. But at least they don't have to share their Halloween candy!)
As soon as we told people, we got advice. Vegan! Paleo! (Wait. What?) We basically lived on kale for a few days. I like kale. My husband (still) likes me. Kale is inexpensive and filling. I tried four different preparations in that first week. (Josh liked one of them!) Thankfully, he had an appointment with a dietitian to make a personalized meal plan. I went with him. I am doing this too. What the heck is a diabetic diet? I'm an excellent cook, but I need to know the rules. What are the rules?
Diabetes is, among other things, a battle against bad habits. Good food is good. Bad food is very bad. Exercise is important. Count. Pay attention. Measure. No cheating. OK. This is going to be good. This is not going to be easy, but it is going to be good.
We've been promised that at some point you stop wanting terrible foods. I don't know if that's true. Breaking habits is hard. What will my new go to its-5:30p.m.-and-I-haven't-cooked-anything dinner for the family be? (Fish, if you are wondering.) What will I reach for if I'm hungry at 3:30?
We are only a few weeks in. We are learning. I still like Kale, but I've diversified. Josh is training for his marathon. I'm not, but I get up and exercise when he goes out to run in the morning before the kids are up. The kids have stopped asking for dessert. Becca joins me in eating Kale, even when no one else will. This is going to be awesome.